The start of the New Year brings so much excitement for me in dreaming about the possibilities that lie ahead. This year, I’m hopeful to get back to a more normal way of life and routine after one of the most difficult years in history. I choose to continue to practice radical acceptance knowing that I cannot change the present facts even if they’re difficult and I don’t like them, but at the same time, I hold hope that positive change will take place in the near future.
One of my favorite activities in the New Year is to set intentions. Unlike resolutions, which are short-term and goal oriented, intentions are broader and connected to personal values. It’s important to keep in mind that when setting intentions, we seek out a journey, not a destination. Below are some steps to better understand what intention setting is all about.
Step 1: Identify your values
If you haven’t ever identified your core values, I highly recommend it! I love using the list that Brene Brown provides on her website here. You can take one of the many free values inventories online such as the Life Values Inventory or Personal Values assessment. Another way to figure out your values is by looking at your mentors and asking yourself what you revere about them.
Step 2: Set an intention for each of your core values
Let’s say that one of your core values is health. An intention could be to lower your stress levels. If a core value is family, maybe you set an intention to be more present with your children. If a value is growth, you can set an intention to increase self awareness.
Step 3: Get specific about ways to achieve that intention
So, if your value is health and your intention is to lower your stress levels, you can begin by creating a self care plan. For the intention of being more present with your children, you can put your phone away for 20 minutes of undistracted engagement. For increasing self awareness, you can learn more about your enneagram number by reading “The Road Back To You”. Or, better yet, you can find a counselor or coach to support this journey! :)
Step 4: Identify how you can incorporate these efforts into your routine
Once you create your self care plan, choose a couple items that you can easily build into your weekly routine. Don’t try to include all of the items on your plan all at once. This is a process that will evolve over time. Remember, life is a rhythm, a dance. One day yoga might work, the next day self care means resting or meditating. Maybe for the undistracted kid time, you start with 5 minutes of phoneless play time or no phones at dinner. For increasing self awareness, read a couple pages each night before bed of the book or set a regular counseling appointment with your therapist.
Step 5: Choose a focal word or phrase that connects you to your intentions
This could simply be stating your core values each morning as you breathe, “Health...Family…Growth.” Or you could breathe to the phrase “I value intentionality” each morning when you wake up. Write them down where they are visible for you and set a routine to breathe to that connection each morning before your feet hit the floor.
Don’t forget to commemorate your intentions in some form throughout the year. This could be in a journal or by creating an art piece that you add to little by little. One form is more concrete, the other abstract. Do whatever works for you and gives meaning to your sweet, intention-filled journey.
Annie Tam
